HRM King Spinster

The Nightmare Before Testing

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Dearest Gentle Reader, Come and gather round the fire while I relate to you this strangest of tales. Alas, that there are no ghosts to bring holiday redemption or hearts bursting into joyfulness and expanding with love (time three no less!), but sometimes true tales do not sport such happy endings. Our tale begins one day in the late autumn in a small village called Stewarttown. Now this town had a mayor named Burgerspinster Spinsterburger. Even though he actually held the title of mayor, he was essentially its dictator. And Burgerspinster Spinsterburger’s tiny shriveled heart held a secret. Inside his …

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HRM King Spinster Top 10 Lists

Top 10 Symptoms That the King is Experiencing Roid Rage

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10) Extra paranoia in addition to his regular paranoia 9) Has an unnatural hatred of pitchforks – that useful barn tool! 8) Temper tantrums enhanced by super sweats 7) Thinks postal gnomes are stealing his mail for profit (Step 1 – Steal Mail, Step 2 – ??, Step 3 – PROFIT!!) 6) Has stashes of extra clothes everywhere because Hulk gets angry and rips them 5) Has anger that can only be appeased by hearing Kerlores Dumbridge-Void’s nasal tones 4) Eyeballs start to sweat whenever he tries to read email on a computer screen – therefore, he doesn’t read email. …

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HRM King Spinster News Observations School Bored

Rules for Thee and NOT for Me

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Dearest Gentle Reader, I’ve heard it said that great communication begins with connection, and it’s one of those maxims that seems so apparently true that, rather than being profound, it just comes across as being obvious. Recently a communication between the King and School Bored fell into this author’s hands, and thus into this column. In the letter, the King disparages the district as a whole, its staff, and to close, the Bored itself. Now for those of you having no idea what the King is referring to when he talks about people showing up with pitchforks, it’s that he …

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Top 10 Lists

Top 10 Ways to Ruin Your Relationship with Your Staff Before Even Starting

10) Give your staff a book to read that’s 24 years old 9) Create a “communication plan” that literally puts up roadblocks to communication 8) Use AI to write multiple versions of emails – and send them all – AT THE SAME TIME! 7) Thinks that everyone’s jobs are so easy that he can fill in for anyone and everyone in addition to being the King! 6) Give the staff “lumpy” water because he doesn’t understand that coffee beans have to be roasted and ground before they “change” it.  5) Tries to inspire the staff by posting inspirational messages (i.e. …

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Observations

Humor & the Truth

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Dearest Gentle Reader, It has long been said that If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny or they’ll kill you. Sadly, this author feels that she has put her proverbial head into the noose, because it has been so difficult to deliver the news of the Kingdom in such a way that it will be palatable to the masses, who are in fact, the targeted audience of this little society news. While historically, the Kingdom has had its share of problems, never has it been harder to find a light-hearted thread to cast upon the loom of …

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FedHock front door covered with snow. A King Snowman is in front.
Observations

Snow Psychosis – It’s Real!

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Dearest Gentle Reader- It has been said that “Snow brings a special quality with it — the power to stop life as you know it dead in its tracks.” And this author, along with everyone else in education, understands this more than anyone else. Snow days have become a hallmark of fond childhood reminisces, but living through snow day mania is actually quite painful. When meteorologists include that snowflake icon in their forecasts, it sets off a mental whirlwind of anticipation, regardless of it being reasonable or not. Some hallmarks of Snow Psychosis as evidenced in schools: This excitability around this …

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People School Bored

Meet the Bored

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Dearest Gentle Reader, It has been said that before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others. If this is true, then one could deduce that our School Bored is a dismal failure. Take the leader of the Bored, Kerlores Dumbridge-Void, our very own Queen of Hearts. If one looks past her penchant for always trying to decapitate, metaphorically speaking, anyone she perceives to be an enemy (and everyone is the enemy!) she seems to have zero to little notion of what growing others even means. In …

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HRM King Spinster People

The King Has Spoken

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Dearest gentle reader, Despite his short time with us, having started his journey on August 1st and having shared his  “vision” during convocation, the King just wants to say thank you to those who are “tea bags.”  As peons, we have a choice. We can submit to the environment that is imposed on us by the King and allow the environment to change us OR we can stick to our ideals and keep doing what is right for our students. Far too often, a despotic environment dims our light, and we tire of fighting for what we know is right …

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Labrinthia The Tournament Field

God Doubles Down on Gridiron

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Dearest gentle reader, It has been said that there are more important things than winning or losing a game, but FedHock’s gridiron players have raised losing to an entirely new art form. This author had certainly held high hopes for the games against non-God opponents, but alas winning was not meant to be. Simply stated, the losses have moved from heartbreaking to body breaking. If God wanted to assure a win for His beloved Madonna, he made sure that FedHock would not carry any type of season momentum when coming against His God Squad. Following four straight losses (Millersport 30-20, …

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HRM King Spinster Top 10 Lists

Top 10 Signs that You May Have the Correct Anatomical Characteristics to be a King

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Dearest Gentle Reader, This author brings to you… The Top 10 Signs that You May Have the Correct Anatomical Characteristics to be a King 10) Demonstrates Selective Hearing 9) Frontal Lobe Developed Towards Need for Adulation 8) High in the Instep 7) Muscular Physique to Assert Physical Domination (along with a very large spleen) 6) Hosts Respiratory Demon (assists with blowing a lot of hot air) 5) Lack of/underdeveloped Humerus 4) Selectively Attractive Gluteus Maximus (for those who bestow posterior smooches) 3) Penetrating Predator Gaze 2) Dopamine Addiction to Social Media And the number one sign that you have the …

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